I believe i might have a personality dissorder.. heres a list of why
1.Loss of identity
2.Weird personality, beliefs and thoughts
3.I can convince myself things are real, like think oh if you touch that wall its bad luck, it will melt. And believe it
4.I have this extreme emptyness where i feel like the world imploding whenever theres nothing to distract me.
5.I trust no one.
6. I’m really impulsive but only in little bursts, I go on like binge sprees, sex, money spending, drugs and sleeping in particular.
7. Suicidal thoughts and attempts
8. My anger level goes from 0 to 100 over the smallest things. i get completely inapropiately angry over little things.
9. I avoid direct attention. I dont want it but i need it because im worried that i need help..
10. I have slight ocd. Like I invent laws in my head (that door must always be closed, close it whenever you see it open. Or when you see the color yellow cough or you’ll get the flu.)
11.Odd habits, random mood swings, omens and signs own my ***, they freak me out and change my plans.
12. I lose track of reality, everything just feels like a dream so why not do whatever you want? kill something? yeah! spend your trust fund? sure!
13. I can piss myself off severely, just by sitting and thinking I can go into a blind rage,
14. I always feel like everyone has this big elaborate plan against me and are only out to hurt or humiliate me.
15. I constantly think people can read my thoughts.
16. I always feel watched and paranoid.
17. when i get nervous the joints in my hands hurt until i crack them so everyone thinks im weird always fondling my wrists and usually I itch when nervousw too.
18. I have appocoliptic thinking. I always feel like if something happens everything is over and i have to kill myself.
19. I shut down and ignore everyone, sometimes i cant even hear them.
20. I have little moments of random euphoria, and then the simplest thing like not walking fast enough or someone not looking how i expected them to look ruin my day.
21. I talk to myself, Because no one else will listen to my ideas..
22. I constantly think outloud quietly, only one person has ever noticed.
23. I always feel like i need to be doing something productive or i get frustrated and upset.
24. I have severe depression. Got it from both parents.
25. I cant sleep because my dreams are too real and my senses are stronger in them and usually theyre about torture and death and pain and psychopaths so i dont sleep more than an hr at a time, i set an alarm to wake me up before my rem cycle.
26. My consionces are very opinionated and i hear them clearly in my mind. I often hear a voice that only says things like "see that car? jump in front of it. see that rope? make a noose. die you worthless createn. kill yourself,"
I’m starting to get nervous and dont know what to do. None of the doctors ive talked to take me seriously because i’m 14 but they wont even listen to me or let me explain. I’m scared and alone and my family is dysfunctional so i cant ask for help from them. I know yahoo answers isnt really a crisis go-to but maybe there are some good people on here. Any suggestions on whats wrong is appreciated, thanks.
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